My Dear Guru Mahārāja,
Please accept my humble obeisance unto your divine lotus feet. All glories to Jagatguru Śrīla Prabhupāda. All glories to your Holiness.
Today is the very auspicious day of your divine appearance. In the life of a disciple what can be a more sweeter day than the appearance day of his beloved spiritual master who is the life and soul of the disciple? For singing the glories of the spiritual master what can be a more better day? Today is the day when a disciple opens his heart and with a great feeling sings the glory of the spiritual master in a loud voice, as Śrīla Narottama dāsa Ṭhākura confirmed it, ebe jaśa ghuṣuk tribhuvana. But a fool like me neither has any word nor possesses any feeling in the heart. So how can I glorify Your Holiness? I am just like the small child who is always busy with his own self and don’t even try to realize about what kind of troubles his father is going through to maintain and protect him.
Every day I try to search in internet about your health updates where I see how all the devotees all over the planet are praying for your health and also doing some tapasya. But O beloved father I don’t remember of feeling ever in such way. I am always absorbed in the struggle of sustaining in my own spiritual life. Although I know this clearly that whatever spiritual life I am talking about has no existence without you, still I don’t have any such emotions. Then what is my hope? Just like the father never rejects the son rather whatever demand the son makes he happily grants it. Similarly today in this very auspicious day I have come to you with some humble selfish demands. As the 4 year small baby will never ask the father for some big bungalow or some big things but only some candy or toys similarly I also have some small prayers which are very insignificant in front of your greatness.
In the Bhagvatam there are the prayers of great devotees where they prayed for sufferings and troubles so that they always can remember the lord. There is no doubt in their exalted spiritual position but for a tiny aspiring devotee like me when in spite of having all these favorable devotional facilities staying in Gṛhastha āśrama it is difficult to do bhakti seriously. Therefore Dear Gurudeva I pray to you, please help me to be fixed in my spiritual vows. lease shower your mercy upon me so that I may never think of leaving this association what to speak of Bhakti. I don’t know when it will be possible to get out of this ocean of saṁsāra but I just pray that please help me to get out of this ocean of anarthas. You know well what a big rascal I am, my mind is filled with stacks of material desires. Bhagvatam says that although it is condemned still such material desires can also be fulfilled by the mercy of lord. And here is my fear. Please never let them be fulfilled. I honestly confess today, I am unable to deal with these desires driven by the anarthas. Therefore I request you please take the charge of my mind and never allow these desires to be fructified rather please destroy them and replace with spiritual desires.
O Dear Gurudeva, I don’t have anything to show my gratitude to you. You please be satisfied by your own mercy. My only aspiration and inspiration is just to serve your instructions. Please bless me with success in this mission.
Your insignificant humble servant,
Ramgopal Singh