Dear guru maharaj,
All obeisances to the holy dust of your divine lotus feet. All glories to Sirla Prabhupada.
I have never been to Mayapur and whenever I heard about it, it seemed like a distant mystical land of Gauranga. Every year I yearn to be there, yern to meet you but some how the other it always remain a distant dream( maybe because of my prarabhdhas).
This year too, I believed that going to Mayapur would be an encore of broken dreams but...
Lo and behold! Magic happened.
I came to know you were coming to Delhi for 2 days for a diksha ceremony. It was going to be the very first time that I was going to meet you.
I have heard so much about you Guru maharaj from many of your disciples like Her Grace Sadguru seva Nandani mataji. I have read about you, seen your video on YouTube.... I am so much inspired by the magic of Gauranga that you create in life of people at every nook and corner of the city, your lotus feet touches.
I was so much bubbling with enthusiasm that I asked mataji how can I serve Guru maharaj, what will make him happy and she mercifully guided me to chant the name of Gauranga and collect the funds for tovp exhibits.
I have never done fund collection in my life, Iwas too shy to approach people for it ( maybe it was my ego of being a doctor and to approach my patients for collection).
But something in me said, go for it!
It will make you happy.
Something in me broke the ice and chanting your pranam mantra, given by merciful mataji, I began with the task.
Carrying a stupid ego of a doctor is not a wise thing because as soon as I got the forms of tovp exhibits from His grace Radhapati Gopinath prabhuji, I built an air castle of being your number one fund raiser and dreaming of getting a pat on my back from you and a distinguish recognition.
It didn't take a while for that bubble to burst. ( Thank you for a reality check. A servant should always be a servant, nothing can be done without help of Guru and Gauranga).
I was disappointed, all I was collecting was couple of random coins, stuck in dark corners of the wallets of people I approached. I thought too big of myself but I collected Rs 210/- in different sizes and dimension of the currency.
Melancholy clouded my heart and I sat in front of your picture in my alter and offered you that money.
Suddenly like a ray of sunshine peeps from the dark clouds, a realisation stuck me, I can't pretend to be a beggar, I have to be one.
I have to crush all that pomp and show stuff and be real. First it was my ego and now it was my prestige that packed bags to leave me. All thanks to you Guru maharaj for a dose for anartha nivratti.(But I still have many).
Again, being your humbled infinitesimal soldier, I again stepped into the battle field. With the name of Gauranga on my lips and you in my heart I again started anew.
Few days are good, few days are bad but most days are magical.
I started to approach people that I thought I could never have this kind of spiritual talk, not only I got a positive response from them but also they started chanting hare krsna mahamantra. It was showers of your mercy that helped me and them.
You made me new friends.
You gave me new realisation.
You gave me a new goal.
In fact you gave me a new life!
Dear guru maharaj, I am too far away to be your number one fund raiser but I am happy being a squirrel that helped lord Ram to build a bridge across ocean to Lanka. Maybe I am still more small being a squirrel but it gives my heart a great deal of satisfaction to be of some use to your service to Prabhupada.
And when I heard I have an opportunity to see you for first time in real ( even though there is no difference between you and your picture in my alter), it seemed as showers of causeless mercy of Gauranga on me.
Seeing your effulgent self it felt that my long last desire being fulfilled. Entire Mayapur was before my eyes. Lords of my life Nitia Gaurchandra are personally there especially for me.
Your darshan were as soothing as moon rays for fallen souls like us who are burning in forest fire of this material life.
Thank you for everything Guru maharaj.
Always the servant of your lotus feet,
Sonal Arora
Aspiring disciple