Dear Guru Maharaj please accept my respectful obeisances at your lotus feet. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
Guru Maharaj wishing you a very happy Krishna conscious birthday. Guru Maharaj as your Pranam Mantra says so are your actions in actually giving the mercy of Lord Nityanand to all people from all stratums of society. This is something very unique as your disciples are from a very diverse background. Business professionals, doctors, engineers, politicians, academics, musicians, those dealing with ghosts and spirits, Landlords and so on practically people from all occupations. This actually shows the depth of your compassion manifesting in preaching and distributing the mercy of Lord Chaitanya to whoever comes forward irrespective of their social background.
Guru Maharaj it was so inspiring to see how you took so much precaution in following the doctors instructions in keeping yourself safe and not traveling for a year. As you expressed it is very difficult for to stay at one place for a long time. It should be difficult for you not to travel especially when you have the fattest passport in the world because of so much travel. But Guru Maharaj you took it very seriously so that you can recuperate fast and then again travel and distribute the mercy. And you rightly did so by going for a there month world tour immediately after finishing one year extra precaution time. This shows your eagerness to reach the conditioned souls and help them become Krishna conscious.
Guru Maharaj you never complained about your health issues even though there were eight holes in your body during that formidable operation of your lungs and kidneys. Mahawaraha Prabhuji was sharing that how you were in so much pain after that operation that one time you were beating the bed with your hand due to excruciating pain but still you never left us because of your compassion on us and your strong desire to fulfill all of Srila Prabhupada instructions to you. Guru Maharaj you are very beautifully developing the Sri Mayapur project that Srila Prabhupada had so kindly entrusted to you. By seeing your enthusiasm to serve Srila Prabhupada and previous Acharya's we feel so much inspired to dedicate our lives for the movement of Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu.
Guru Maharaj more than 50 thousand disciples have taken shelter under your lotus feet but we still never feel lost in the crowd. Despite of your very busy schedule we could always approach you and have personal audience. Guru Maharaj even after having such a nice environment for developing Krishna consciousness and protection in Iskcon under your lotus feet this wreched disciple of yours keep making the mistakes which are not conducive for Krishna consciousness. I always get carried away by the desire for sense gratification and allurements of Maya in many different forms to the degree that ultimately I find myself in a precarious condition. Last year I joined Brahmachari Ashram and for that opportune moment I waited for many years but ultimately I realized that my motivation to join the Ashram was not service but sense gratification in the form of name and fame. And I was aware of this fact all the while but still I could not stop myself from doing so and the result was, as expected, I could not survive in the Ashram. I had to leave the Ashram immediately after training at the cost of the disappointment of so many people who had so many expectations from me.
During this Ashram training by your mercy I was able to see how much arrogant and proud I was of my education and whatever little I had. I am very much thankful to the trainers and the Lord who kindly exposed myself fully. Now Guru Maharaj again I find myself in a very awkward situation. I feel old to get married and I also have no savings as I didn't plan for marriage so I didn't not save anything. Second challenge is to find a suitable girl who meets the criterian of a devotee and from the same cast as in my family cast plays a huge role for the acceptance in the society.
Guru Maharaj I am also facing another severe challenge. I used to be so much enthusiastic to serve Srila Prabhupada in the beginning of my devotional life but now it's drying up. Now I feel to somehow just finish my number of rounds without doing anything extra. Guru Maharaj this very fallen servant of yours prays at your lotus feet to kindly uplift me from this harmful condition and make me an instrument of your will. Please bless me so that I may always feel enthusiastic to pay heed to every single instruction of yours and act accordingly to serve you in your service to Srila Prabhupada. Jay Guru Maharaj. Jay Srila Prabhupada. Gauranga Nityanand. Hare Krishna !!!
Your insignificant servant,
Sridhar Gaur Bhakta Das
Mayapur