My dear spiritual master, His Holiness Jayapatākā Swami Guru Mahārāja,
I offer my respectful obeisances at the dust of your Sankīrtana lotus feet on the auspicious occasion of your 75th Vyāsa-pūjā celebration.
My considerate spiritual father, my wicked mind brought me into this world of embarrassment, but your swan-like pure, elevated self has taken charge to rescue me. You saw me completely fallen and wretched, took pity, and came to me saying,
“O humbled soul, please listen to this good tiding, for it will gladden your heart. Prem Purushottam Śrī Kṛṣṇa Caitanya, who is Kṛṣṇa Himself, the son of Nanda, has saved the world by freely distributing His own Holy Name. Go to that Śrī Gauranga and receive your deliverance too.”
My dear saviour and role model,
I have not been able to strengthen my bond with you over the years. I have failed as a disciple by not inheriting your mood. Due to a lack of urgency and sincerity, I could not inherit even an iota of your glorious qualities:
Your ever-grateful disciple consciousness.
Your anxiety to utilise 24hrs in devotional service.
Your perseverance and reserved nature.
Your detachment from all material attractions.
Your selflessness in service without desire for appreciation or reward.
Your unshakable faith in the merciful nature of Lord Kṛṣṇa.
Your eagerness to always serve the Lord despite all reversals.
Your attachment to always chant the holy names of the Lord.
Your eager desire to always glorify the transcendental qualities of the Lord.
Your heartfelt desire to live and serve amidst the pastime places of Lord Caitanya.
Your exclusive dependence on the mercy of Śrīla Prabhupāda.
Anyone who has made your instructions the most cherished goal of their life is the most fortunate and most attractive in the eyes of Kṛṣṇa. Hearing from you in a devotional mood and trying to follow your instructions is the secret to Svarupa Siddhi. A life exclusively dedicated to your service in complete earnestness is the sublime life that I aspire for. When will that day come when I will be submerged in this mellow of simply following you and trying to please you? I hanker for that eternal and most satisfying treasure.
You have revealed in your lecture the importance of this greatest treasure:
“By one particle of dust of the lotus feet of Śrīla Prabhupāda, whole universes are delivered. We are simply implementing. Just we are allowed to feel that we are doing some service, although everything has already been done by him. Simply, if we can be instruments, surrender ourselves as his puppets, so that he can dance us as he likes according to his sweet will.” - (17th September 1979, Los Angeles, USA)
My dear Goṣṭhyānandī Guru Mahārāja,
Your divine grace kindly came to ISKCON Whitefield the previous year, for the Bhoomi Pujan and enthused all of us with your transcendentally invigorating Vani. It was a heart-melting moment for all of us. You left us with missionary instructions which are our constant meditation and have made us more accountable towards contributing to making Bengaluru a Kṛṣṇa Conscious city. You stressed the below points, for our good fortune:
1) “So, by your chanting and congregation, books are being distributed and the preaching is expanding. Actually, if the devotee takes the matter very seriously then there is no limit to how wide and how far this Kṛṣṇa consciousness may spread.”
2) "So, all of you should be very careful to cultivate your bhakti. The bhakti tree is attempted to be broken by Kali-yuga. You should see that your bhakti-vṛkṣa is duly protected."
3) "The secret of bhakti-yoga is to always be busy in Kṛṣṇa’s service. And I see that the devotees are very active in their devotional service. Haribol!"
4) "So, when I was with Śrīla Prabhupāda, Śrīla Prabhupāda requested me to develop the Kingdom of God. So, then a similar request I have here for you in Whitefield. Śrīla Prabhupāda did not say that you enjoy it. But naturally, if you render service to Kṛṣṇa, you will feel happy. You don’t have to try to be happy."
Your blessings are always upon me, I sincerely want to act upon your mercy and contribute in my insignificant capacity to make Bengaluru the first Kṛṣṇa Conscious city. Guru Mahārāja, please consider my request and kindly accept me in your transcendental army. This will be your favour upon me, and my lowly self will be fully reclaimed in serving you. The Śrīmad Bhāgavatam very lucidly illustrates the urgency of meditation on such instructions. “Now I am attracted to those instructions imparted to me by the Personality of Godhead [Govinda] because they are impregnated with instructions for relieving the burning heart in all circumstances of time and space.” (SB 1.15.27)
My dear eternal spiritual father,
You are pleased when your disciples hanker to develop love for Kṛṣṇa and display devotional qualities. You have expressed that all should hanker for a drop of love for Kṛṣṇa.
“Actually, all the devotees when we hear about Kṛṣṇa, we should feel so much of spontaneous love, but some of us are very neophyte, very fallen so we don’t feel that so we keep listening. Gradually our heart gets purified, and also we can, like Śrīla Prabhupāda said if we are not feeling, then we should cry that we are not feeling, if you are not crying that you are not feeling then you should cry that you are not crying. If you are not crying that you are not crying, then you should cry that you are not crying that you are not crying. If you are not crying if you are not crying if you are crying, then you should cry that you are not crying, that you are not crying, that you are not crying! Otherwise, you should have so much intense desire to appreciate Kṛṣṇa’s transcendental qualities, and naturally, you will feel unlimited spiritual bliss.”
I am yet to be able to follow your instructions in the letter. Please forgive me for that. Guru Mahārāja, a spiritual master, is known by the virtues exhibited by the disciples. You are my glorious master, but I have chosen to remain your unchaste disciple, for whom spiritual progress and absorption in the process of nava-vidha bhakti is a dream due to nama aparadh, vaiṣṇava aparadh and sevā apaRādhā.
When will Nityānanda Prabhu be merciful to me and deliver me from the enchantment [māyā] of the sense objects? When will he give me the shade of his lotus feet and the right to enter the marketplace [nama-hatta] of the Holy Name?
When will I buy, borrow or steal the ecstasies of the Holy Name? When will I lose myself in the intoxication of the Holy Name? When will I immerse myself in the nectar of the Holy Name after grasping the empathetic lotus feet of Your Divine Grace? You are a saint, who constantly relishes the flavours [rasa] of devotion. By your mercy anything is possible, I hanker to inherit a drop of your mood and mission.
My most tolerant Guru Mahārāja,
On this auspicious occasion, I again remind myself of your selfless, surrendered service to Śrīla Prabhupāda and your exclusive dependence on the mercy of Lord Caitanya. These two qualities make you the most illustrious example of Ātma-nivedanam. Śrīla Prabhupāda’s elaborates:
“One who has no motive other than to serve the Lord surrenders everything to the Lord and performs his activities only to please the Supreme Personality of Godhead. Such a devotee is like a cow that is cared for by its master. When cared for by its master, a cow is not in anxiety over its maintenance. Such a cow is always devoted to its master, and it never acts independently, but only for the master’s benefit.”(SB 7.5.23-24, Purport)
You are kindly allowing me to assist you in your service to Śrīla Prabhupāda, though my services are grossly materially tinged. By your perseverant favours on me, my services become pure and acceptable to Kṛṣṇa. There is no possibility of ever repaying you. All I aspire to do is to become sincere in your service. You are so humble that when you see your disciples making little advancement in Kṛṣṇa Consciousness, you feel indebted to them. I offer my unlimited respectful obeisances to this inconceivable mood of yours, which is surely a pure glimpse into the heart of Kṛṣṇa, where you eternally reside.
I pray to become more sincere and serious in your service, walk in your footsteps and attain the pure devotional platform, devoid of offences, only for your satisfaction. By your mercy, anyone can achieve the Lotus-feet of Lord Caitanya and I hanker to get a drop of it
Your insincere servant,
Acyuta Arjunasakhā dāsa,
ISKCON Whitefield,
Bengaluru, India