Please accept my humble and respectful obeisances, Guru Mahārāja.
All glories to His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedānta Swāmī Prabhupāda.
I am a dīkṣā disciple from 2012, initiated in Laguna Beach, California, along with my wife Jāśodā Gokularāṇī Pitts.
How can a person infected by the modes of nature and the six enemies of the soul actually honor and give due respect? Is it even possible to thank a great soul for the pain and suffering he undergoes to deliver a fallen soul, especially one as ungrateful as many of us are? Still, it is our duty to try—as inauthentic as it may seem.
As far as I am concerned, it is a special case of compassion that you initiated me into the paramparā, this transcendental science. Such is your causeless mercy.
Still, once a seed is planted, the soil must be fertile and cultivated properly, with great care and attention, in order for the plant to reach maturity. Then there is the possibility of luscious fruit. One cannot leave the shelter, the sun, and water of the spiritual master (association) and expect purification. He or she may grow in imagination, but not in reality. Reality is a platform built on loving service, and I beg that I may return to this reality in all seriousness.
Despite public opinion and the inevitable harassment by the demons, I take shelter under the umbrella of your love for protection from the storms of life.
Please forgive my previous sins and insincerity and let me love you again—deeply.
I wish to apologize for hurting you in any way.
I am never to give up, because ultimately there is nothing but you.
So please, don't abandon me in this great trial of arms against Kali and Māyā.
You are the only general for me.
Please instruct this private in Lord Caitanya’s army.
Bless me with the strength to withstand the onslaught of material nature and die on the battlefield following your indubitable example—trying to love you similarly to how you love us.
All glories to your spiritual master, Jagat-Guru Abhaya Caraṇāravinda Śrīla Prabhupāda.
Thank you, Jayapatākā Svāmī, for caring for all of us, even as Lord Nityānanda cares without consideration.
Hare Kṛṣṇa!
Gaura Premānande!
Submitted by the renegade of serpents,
P.G.G. dāsa