Hare Krishna, Dear Gurumaharaj.
Please accept my most prostrated obeisances millions of times at the dust of your lotus feet! All glories to Srila Prabhupada, who gave you as a matchless gift to our lives.
We cannot imagine a life without you. How we were lost in this material world! Gurumaharaj, on this most auspicious day of your divine appearance, it gives me tremendous feelings of great fortune. How at the peak of my formative years, when I was just getting out of my childhood into my youth, with an inconceivable stroke of good fortune, you came to my life. When I met you, I was completely lost, spiritually orphaned; I didn't know what to do, where to go. There were so many options, so many paths in my vision, and I was lost in that confusion: where to go, what to do. But, when I came to your lotus feet, you gave me shelter, you cared for me. You completely changed the whole complexion of my life, and you took me into your intimate association, always caring for me, always showering your mercy....just like a loving mother takes special care of her disabled child. You cared for every detail of my life: not only the spiritual knowledge, but how to live in this world; what to decide in life. When it came to whether I should become a grihastha or brahmachari, how you personally insisted that I make the right decision, keeping the glorious movement of Prabhupada in the Vision. How, from the first meeting till today, you kept me inspired to preach to armed forces people, whether working or retired... feeling on a spiritual platform, How Arjun, as a military person, was immensely helped by the knowledge of the Bhagavad Gita. You felt compassion for all these people, who were struggling or confused. They had enthusiasm, strength, and ability but lost direction, and goals. You felt for them. And keeping the preaching of the armed forces group in mind, you molded my life in such a way that I could be properly engaged, serving the glorious mission of Shrila Prabhupada. We had a few successes and many many failures. But whether it is success or failure, you always held me close to your lotus feet. And, presently, even though I fell much behind on the path of progress in comparison to many of my god brothers – even while always staying far away from your direct and divine association, I still feel nourished. I still feel greatly connected on a spiritual platform every moment.... how you're holding my hand, and inspiring me from within and without...I am eternally grateful to you.
Dear Gurudev, your relationship with me is like that of the sun and the lotus. My soul was fallen in the dirt of the material world, completely in darkness and confusion. And your divine grace brought me the ray of hope, like your morning sun, and in connection with the bright sunshine of your divine association, my heart started to sprout and grow like a lotus, nourished by the divine message you brought from Lord Chaitanya, all the way through Guru-parampara and Srila Prabhupad, as the lotus of my heart started to flourish, There are many people who got attracted; they took to Krishna consciousness. They are taking to Krishna consciousness. But little they know, the life of the lotus is completely dependent on the mercy of the sun. Sun rises; the lotus starts to blossom; sun sets; the lotus closes its petal, nothing to show to this world, nothing to offer to this world. So as long as, my dear Guru Maharaj, you stay in my consciousness, as long as I focus my whole energy on your lotus feet, the glories of devotional service can flow through me to as many as people, you feel like.
On this Vyasa Puja day, one thing comes very clear to my mind. This glories of devotional service which is flowing through me, it comes from you all the way down the parampara from Lord Chaitanya, Srila Prabhupada. And the moment, my focus shifts from your lotus feet, I know I am finished. And this is our eternal connection; as long as in the material world, or wherever I am, only one task, as your most unworthy disciple, is to be in exclusive shelter of your lotus feet. Then the lotus of my heart can grow and always remain glorious even though millions of miles apart. The connection of the sun with the lotus is eternal. So even though I fell down deep into the ocean of material existence, even though I fell behind in my journey of self-realization because of my own inability to follow the instructions of your Divine Grace, even though my progress is very slow, and as pure devotees, your journey is much faster, so naturally our distance
may increase but no matter how much far away I always remain dependent on your mercy.There is absolutely no other shelter..
Please forgive me for all my inability to serve you, to come closer to you, or fulfill all the desires of your divine grace.
Please forgive me and accept me as your eternal servant.
In my journey in this material world, I have met many people.
I came across so many sadhus, even in our society of Krishna consciousness.
I met so many gurus.
You always have been a kind father to a lost child.
And I am eternally counting my good fortune to have your unlimited kindness always showered upon on me, my family, my wife, and my daughter.
How you feel when I am happy, and how you feel proud every time, I brought a little success, and how you always keep praying for us every day.
Where will I find a father like you?
On this Vyasa Puja day, these are a few thoughts that are coming to my mind.
I am not an ideal disciple, and I may not become ideal in this life, but I am completely dependent on your mercy, and with whatever little strength and intelligence I have, please allow me to offer it to you in your service.
Please accept my meager efforts to serve and please you eternally.
Awaiting for your unconditional love....
Your most unworthy servant,
Amritesh Krishna Das.