Nama Om Vishnu padaya Krsna preshtaya bhutale
Srimate Jayapataka Swamin iti namine
Nama Acaryapadaya Nitai Krpa pradayine
Gaura Katha dhama daya nagara grama tarine
Nama Om Vishnu padaya Krsna preshtaya bhutale
SrimateBhaktivedanta Swamin iti namine
Namaste Saraswate deve Gaura vani pracarine
Nirvisesa sunya vadi pascatya desa tarine
My dearmost spiritual father Srila Gurumaharaj,
Please accept my most respectful obeisances at your lotus feet. All glories to Srila Prabhupada! All glories to your Divine Grace.
Gurumaharaj, everything I do is only by your empowerment. Please, please allow me to write this offering. I started writing the offering many months ago, everytime I start, I get stuck with words to express what I really wish to express.
Gurumaharaj, through all these years, you have been the sole reason for my existence. Before getting the cool shade of shelter of your lotus feet, The Supreme Personality of Godhead, being kind to this soul, put me through all one can go through at an early age, that I couldn’t see any reason for my life. Now, when I look back, I can see how it helped me in my spiritual life. I have nothing to turn back to !
After giving me shelter at your lotus feet, you nurtured me with your mercy. Coming from an impersonalist background – from the land of Sankaracarya and from a communist upbringing – I had no qualification, what so ever, to be anywhere near spiritual life. Your Divine Grace is the deliverer of the fallen. Without my knowledge, you turned this burnt charcoal into something useful. Once when you came to temple, I was standing at the entrance. When I saw you, I was thinking - being a filthy person, how can I be in front of a pure devotee. Suddenly, Gurumaharaj, you walked towards me and asked me with a smile, and full of compassion, “ How are you?” . I was shocked! I forgot all my impurities! I became very blissful! Gurumaharaj, this is just one incident. Through many such pastimes of yours, you taught me how to think less of myself. From being a completely negative person, only by your mercy, I could start doing something useful in my life.
Because of my own conditioning, I always wondered how Krishna can love all living entities equally - because I had never seen any one who loved two people equally, what to speak of loving everyone equally! Also, from childhood, I could never understand how someone can be selfless. While in school, after reading about Mahatma Gandhi, I thought he was selfless – until I overheard someone telling that Mahatma Gandhi was selfish, since he did what gave him happiness. When I had your darsan and through the pastimes that I heard from devotees, as well as my own experiences, you practically demonstrated that it is possible to love everyone in the world and also to be selfless. When I read about Krishna’s qualities, and when I can’t get my head around it, I just think how, as the Lord’s representative, Gurumaharaj displays those qualities. Then I feel, if the Lord’s representative can do that, surely Lord Himself can have that quality.
In Srimad Bhagavatam 3.7.19, Vidura says to sage Maitreya.
anuvratānāṁ śiṣyāṇāṁ
putrāṇāṁ ca dvijottama
anāpṛṣṭam api brūyur
guravo dīna-vatsalāḥ
O best among the brāhmaṇas, those who are spiritual masters are very kind to the needy. They are always kind to their followers, disciples and sons, and without being asked by them, the spiritual master describes all that is knowledge.
Being an expert teacher, you have taught me all that I know today, without me realising I am learning.
Completely sentimental, I just thought of you as my hero. I was just mesmerised with your mystic powers. My favourite is to stand far away and talk to Gurumaharaj in my mind and wait for Gurumaharaj to reciprocate! You surprised me by even knowing that is what I am doing!
Without caring for any social etiquettes , without anything else to think about - I literally followed you , Gurumaharaj – especially in Mayapur. I didn’t know any philosophy of Guru tattva, I didn’t know your greatness – I followed you like a normal person follows their idol. You mercifully sent devotees like Ratipriya mataji, Sugopi Sakhi mataji, Shanta Gopi mataji and my biological sister, Amrta sakhi devi dasi – who taught me that there is nothing else in life than Gurumaharaj. Especially in 2008, it is still inconceivable that during the whole Navadwip mandal parikrama, 6 of us ladies, just followed you always. It was just your mercy Gurumaharaj, you allowed us to be with you.. little did we know that it would be the last time you will be walking for the whole parikrama. We didn’t even see any pastime places properly, neither did we hear the classes of other devotees, all we did was walk behind you. Thank you unlimitedly , Gurumaharaj! Please forgive me for not following the etiquette.
I never really thought of serving you- but by your mercy , like a magnet, you kept moving this rusted iron filing in the way you like. Through the years, without my being aware , you engaged me in serving Srila Prabhupad’s mission. If any service I am able to do, I know it is not me! For, I am still the rusted iron filing.
All I do is offenses. Being the most compassionate, you always say you don’t remember any offenses, but I have unlimited offenses in my list that I have done.. I feel very ashamed for being so low. Please forgive me Gurumaharaj.
After 2008, when physical association reduced, I started listening to your lectures more- that opened up a whole new world! Just like we never finish reading Bhagavad Gita, I have not been able to completely listen to your one lecture, Gurumaharaj. I couldn’t go beyond Enlightenment series 1 because each time I hear a lecture, I find more points that I have not noticed in my previous listening. Gurumaharaj, please bless me to be always attached to hearing your lectures.
Gurumaharaj, all your disciples are so amazing! All of them are so efficient! When I see them, I really pray that I become a little good instrument for you. Each one of them is a touch stone. Many of my godbrothers and god sisters engage me in your service. They are very kind and tolerant.I am indebted to all the devotees who engage me in your service.
The icing on the cake of mercy is the service that His Grace Vrajeshwar Gaura prabhu engages me in..It is difficult to even believe it is not a dream ! I learn a lot just by this service. I am eternally indebted to Vrajeswar prabhu for being so tolerant and continuing to engage me inspite of my many shortcomings. Not only does he engages me in service, but he also guides me how to do it with the right mood. It is unfathomable, inconceivable mercy. I wait every day for the message. Till I get the message, I feel lost and lethargic. As soon as I get the message, a new life comes. Through this service, I get first hand experience of Gurumaharaj’s compassion , care and selfless nature. I see the strong soldier who is always alert in protecting ISKCON, the street sweeper whom Srila Bhakti Vinod Thakur mentions in Godruma kalpatavi as vigilant to even the smallest deviations from Srila Prabhupad’s teachings; a perfect world leader who engages, encourages and guides devotees all over the world in the most sublime mission; a super computer who remembers even the minutest details, a strong pillar undisturbed in all situations, a gentle heart concerned about every one’s welfare including marriages, a philosopher who can give cut right answers, a guide who has all the time for his students, a father who is concerned about the safety and well being of his children, a project manager who manages hundreds of projects with zero defect, a perfect Bhakti vriksha leader enquiring about the welfare of the members, the list is endless.. Millions of obeisances at your divine lotus feet, Gurumaharaj. Please empower me to do this service properly, without mistakes.
I am also grateful to many other godbrothers and godsisters who keep me Krishna conscious and Gurumaharaj conscious.
Thanks to Vidvan prabhu and Jaya Radhakrishna prabhu – always encouraging and guiding.
Thanks to Chudamani mataji – who cares for me more than my biological mother. She teaches me how to live for Gurumaharaj; always meditating on serving Gurumaharaj.
Thanks to Aravinda Krishna prabhu and Yamuneswari mataji- guiding us in Bhakti Vriksha and showing us by example how to dedicate every moment of our life to fulfil Gurumaharaj’s desires!
I don’t deserve even a moment of their association, but by your mercy, I get to do service under them. Thank you Gurumaharaj.
Gurumaharaj, you not only gave me a life, but also handed me in the care of my husband who, true to the name you have given him, allows me to do whatever service comes my way. By his mercy, I am able to do services in a very protective environment. He taught me that Gurumaharaj’s service comes first, everything else later ! I pray that I can serve him the way you would like me to.
Thank you Gurumaharaj, for sending such wonderful souls in our congregation. I learn a lot from them. Please use us as your via medium to help them in their spiritual life. Please bless all of them to progress in their spiritual life very quickly. Please bless us that everyone who comes in contact with us becomes a leader and a frontline preacher in Lord Caitanya’s army.
Please kindly bless our biological parents to take up serious Krishna consciousness. Please use them in your mission.
Gurumaharaj, please allow me to serve my God family in all ways that you would like me to. Please help me to over come all my bad qualities and anarthas so that I can progress in my spiritual life.
Gurumaharaj, please bless that I always do only what you would like me to do in every moment of my life; that you please allow us to execute your plans. Please allow us to stay focussed on our mission - to report to you that the market is saturated with Krishna consciousness.
Your insignificant spiritual daughter,
Amala Manjari devi dasi
Diksha disciple
Reading, UK
